Online dating can be a fun and exciting way to meet new people and potentially find a romantic partner. Here are some tips for women to make the most of their online dating experience.
1. You can find and meet more guys.
Offline, you can meet guys at the bar through mutual friends, at work, at the grocery store and gym etc.
But what if your Mr Perfect lives on the other side of town and does not ever visit your gym or your favourite pub and does not have any friends in common?
By going online you can access a whole lot more guys you would not otherwise be able to meet or interact with.
2. You can target your search.
You have worked with some coaching clients who are only interested in dating men who share their religious beliefs for example, dating websites let you narrow your search to like-minded guys so you can join a site then you will know before you even meet a guy that he is going to meet that criterion.
There are weird niche dating sites out there too. Farmers Only for instance is a site for single farmers or gluten-free singles if you are looking to date someone with celiac disease, there are weird ones too but leave those one’s for you to find on your own.
3. You don’t have to put in much effort
No need to get dolled up and hit the club to meet guys if you are using a dating site, once you create a good profile you can sit back and wait for a man to message you.
Now that is not always the best way to meet guys online but it is definitely possible because there are way more men on dating websites than there are women.
4. You can do your homework before the first date.
It shows up for a blind date that your friends have set up only to discover that your date looks like a great personality to match.
With online dating, you can at least chat with a guy and learn a bit about him before you agree to meet them in person which reduces the chance of a tragic first date.
Those are four of the biggest advantages of online dating but there are also a few drawbacks, most importantly personal safety.
Much like the offline world, there are some bad intentions on dating sites so you need to be careful not to disclose too many personal details and be cautious when you first meet in person. Follow basic safety stuff and then you will be fine.
The second drawback to online dating is actually the same as one of the advantages I just talked about, you have got your choice of thousands of men online which is a good thing but it is also a bad thing if it leads you to be way too picky, so resist the temptation to delete messages from men who do not exactly match your idea of the perfect guy.
Scientists call this the “theory of choice” but I personally think it is generally a good problem to have.
The things you should do to maximize your chance of meeting your soul mate online:
1. Choose the website wisely
As I mentioned there are hundreds of dating sites out there and some are better than others unless you are only interested in dating with a real personality Then I suggest you sign up for a couple of the biggest well-known dating sites. Those sites usually have tons of male members who live in your area
Those match-making algorithms that some dating websites advertising are generally pretty useless but they do have one advantage, they weed out the creeps who are just looking to get laid because most of those losers are too lazy to spend an hour filling out questionnaires.
Similarly, if you are looking for a long-term relationship and not just someone to hook up with then choose a paid dating website rather than one of the free ones because anyone willing to pay for a subscription is going to be a lot more serious about finding love online.
Writing a good profile is not as hard as you might imagine.
First, choose the right photo.
That means choosing a picture that is flattering but not obviously unrealistic if you are looking for a husband here ladies then your profile pic should not be 90% cleavage.
It is also never a bad idea to upload one or two photos of you with other good-looking guys, friends, exes, etc. This subtly conveys the message that you are desirable and wanted by men and subconsciously makes you more attractive in the eyes of any guy looking at your profile.
As for the actual profile itself do not overthink things it is okay to leave out certain details that aren’t so flattering or a bit vague especially when it comes to personal details.
But do not outright line or profile write all that does is lead to awkward disappointing first dates. Keep it brief, highlight a few of your more attractive qualities without bragging and try to mix in a joke or amusing anecdote.
3. Don’t delete all the messages you receive on dating sites.
Yes, know it can be overwhelming to have 25 new messages arrive each day especially if most of them are absolute garbage, scan your inbox for messages that look even remotely like a possibility and read the message and view the guy’s profile before you trash it.
If you would be a great catch for any man and I’m sure you would be then you are bound to receive messages from normal quality men every and then.
4. Put in some effort.
I know I said that online dating takes almost no effort on your part but that is not the best way to use dating websites.
In fact, you will have even more success if you browse through profiles and reach out to guys that spark your interest.
By taking the initiative and reaching out to all the guys who meet your criteria you are almost guaranteed to get responses from most of the guys you contact.
Do not be picky when it comes to who you contact especially at first but that said, do be careful any time you see a profile that looks too good to be true.
5. Exchange a few messages before you agree to meet in person
Do not have a six months pen pal relationship with a guy before your first date because research has shown that too much talking before meeting a man is actually a bad thing
But you do want to get some basic info about the guy can you read and write like an adult, does he have a job, and a sense of humour, is he looking for a casual fling or a serious relationship?
After you get a sense of the basic stuff if you are still interested call and ask them to meet for coffee in person you will be able to decide if he is a waste of time or worthy of another date.
6. Be smart when planning the first in-person meeting
First of all, always insist on having your first date with a guy you meet online in a public setting, meet for a coffee at the bar after work goes bowling etc. This is a no-brainer for your own safety
Secondly, you want to make sure that you have an easy believable escape plan in case the date is a disaster, meeting for coffee for instance does not require you to commit to spending a couple of hours with the guy like going to a movie would.
If things are going well you can turn a coffee date into a dinner date but you can also bail after 20 minutes and it won’t be weird.
Another excellent way to do this is to ask a friend to call you 10 or 15 minutes into the date so if you need a way out you can pretend it is your boss on the phone and say that as an excuse to bail early or if things are going well you can just completely ignore the call.
Now to be perfectly honest a lot of women can get to this point on their own. much of the stuff I have just talked about is hardly rocket science but when it comes to a second date or turning a casual fling into a real relationship that is where things go sour for a ton of women even really beautiful successful women often struggle to get a man to commit or keeping guys from losing interest.
Do leave comments